I Talk To Strangers…You Should Too!

randi rentz

Long time LBBC blog contributor, RANDI RENTZ, graduated with honors from The Johns Hopkins University with a Masters degree in Special Education. She was an editorial assistant for a publishing company in suburban Washington,DC before becoming a special education teacher in a school district outside Philadelphia, PA. Randi currently is an Asperger’s Support Teacher for grades kindergarten through fifth. Presently, Randi has her own consulting company for children on the Autistic Spectrum where you can see her work at   www.helpforaspergers.com. She is a proud member, supporter, and blogger for many breast cancer organizations and never leaves the house without diamonds. Visit Randi at her web site at www.randirentz.com. Be sure to check out the teaser for her upcoming book “Why Buy a Wig…When You Can Buy Diamonds!”

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Call me crazy, but I look forward to waiting in line, and just about any opportunity to shoot the breeze with people I don’t know. I’m chummy with the guy who pumps my gas, (the only gas station nearby where they still pump gas for you), still exchange holiday cards with my 4th grade elementary school teacher, and the other day I spent a solid hour gabbing with an 81-year old woman I met at the tailor’s while having my pants hemmed.

I’m now a life-long, die-hard people person. I never used to be, though. In fact, I never enjoyed chatty encounters with people I didn’t know…until cancer. I wasn’t hostile before breast cancer.  Every day I had pleasant exchanges with strangers and acquaintances—an enthusiastic “Morning!” or a friendly “Have a great day!”  Such moments continue to be life-affirming, yet, prior to breast cancer, they were blessedly brief.

On-the-fly updates from people I’ve barely met used to drain me. Seriously.  I always felt obliged to respond with genuine emotion, to pay real attention. I would fake outrage or concern, with a performance that was definitely Oscar worthy. That meant stopping whatever I was doing, and force myself to focus. Since my laser-beam concentration was always sensed by the people stopping me, their details got longer and longer. Oy, vey! I felt trapped like a mouse in a maze.

Did breast cancer make me a people person? Well, I think it made me more aware of the little moments in life that make up the big moments. I now enjoy being a true people person—even though I’m inclined to dislike anyone who describes himself/herself this way. Go figure. I digress, sorry. Anyhoo, hear me out. Lifting your head and engaging with whoever happens to be standing next to you is worth the effort. It’s nice to see people smile and to genuinely smile back. It really feels good and refreshing. You should try it.

For one thing, you never know when you will receive priceless advice.  The 81-year-old cautioned me to get in good with my son’s future wife and to always take the dog out for an evening walk to do “its business.” Little did she know, I have no children and own two cats which use a litter-box. Needless to say, I felt it worthy to file away her words of wisdom. Maybe a stepson and a dog are in my future. Who knows? I digress. Sorry. When I left the fitting room, fiddling with the waistband of my pants, she said, “With posture like that, who needs Spanx? Coming from a stooped octogenarian, her words felt like a wake-up call to enjoy my youthful existence.

I believe my world is bigger with my random encounters. My brushes with strangers bring me the thrill of the unexpected, to glimpse a world I used to brush off and otherwise never see or appreciate. In the frenzy of life, with intense money, work and time pressure, I honestly didn’t have much conversational energy to spare.

Now, I think of it as a habit as “meeting new people,” even if I never see them again. My encounters with strangers bring me back to a place where I long to be. I never had grandparents, because they died before I was born.  But now I cherish chance meetings with people of all ages, especially older people. I find their perspective to be rather eye-opening.

Instead of rolling my eyes, I appreciate the interruption. I am so grateful for the little things in life. I now understand what being a warm person means.

And now, onto the Spanx…

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LBBC’s Triple-Negative Breast Cancer Focus Groups Need Participants!

TN Focus Group Header

Do you have triple-negative breast cancer, or know someone who does? LBBC is planning several focus groups to learn about the needs of women living with triple-negative breast cancer. Groups are planned in the areas of Chapel Hill, N.C., on April 10; Philadelphia, Pa., on April 12 and April 13, (focusing on metastatic breast cancer); and San Francisco, Calif., and Indianapolis, Ind., the last week of April (dates TBD). Groups last 90 minutes, and participants receive a $25 gift card for their time. If you are interested in participating in a focus group, please contact us ASAP at publications@lbbc.org and let us know which location interests you. We will be in touch with more information!

Emily Cousins: Looking for Links between Cancer and the Environment

C4YW is just a few weeks away, and we are excited  to see all of the strong, thriving young women who are planning to attend! Today the C4YW Blog is happy to introduce Emily Cousins, another young woman working hard to better herself and other survivors for her first entry! Check back  as Emily shares with us her insights on the studies of the environment and breast cancer. Be sure to visit the website and register for this year’s event in Seattle!

Emily Cousins

I was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was 32 years old and in the ninth-month of my first pregnancy. I urged my doctors to give me aggressive treatment because I wanted to live for my new baby. Since then, I have religiously done follow up exams, had screenings, and undergone biopsies. Now, 10 years later, I am considering removing my ovaries to reduce the amount of estrogen in my body.

I try to do all that I can to take care of my body, but through my work for a national environmental organization, I have learned that not all cancer risks are internal. Some come from the air we breathe, the water we drink, and the consumer products we use in our homes.

Breast cancer has been the rise in America in recent decades. Women born in the 1960s are twice as likely to get breast cancer as their grandmothers. And compared to older women, young women tend to face more aggressive cancers. Many factors contribute to the disease, including lifestyle, reproductive history, and genetic mutations. But increasingly, researchers have found chemicals that disrupt the hormones in our bodies can increase the risk of breast cancer.

And unfortunately, those chemicals are all around us. BPA, for instance, is a chemical commonly found in plastic bottles, canned foods, and baby toys. It is also a synthetic form of estrogen, and estrogen feeds breast cancer. BPA has been shown to cause normal breast cells to behave like cancer cells, and it has also been linked to prostate cancer, lower sperm counts, and early puberty. And yet BPA is so ubiquitous that more than 90 percent of Americans have residues of the chemical in their bodies, according to the Centers for Disease Control.

BPA is just one of many hormone disrupting chemicals in our lives. Polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs) are commonly found in soot—the air pollution caused by burning coal, oil, and gasoline. Many PAHs mimic estrogen and have been shown to cause mammary tumors in rats and to interfere with DNA repair in cells.

All the women coming to C4W know the anguish of a breast cancer diagnosis, and we have fought to so hard to vanquish this disease. It doesn’t seem right that we could endure treatment only to increase our risk simply by breathing the air or drinking from a plastic bottle.

I am looking forward to gathering with other survivors at C4W who are committed to reducing environmental hazards. Several experts speaking at the event will help point the way to a healthier, more sustainable future for all of us.

Emily Cousins writes about public health and environmental issues for NRDC. She also blogs about life after cancer for young people at stupidcancer.com. She lives in Seattle with her husband, son, and the daughter she had after cancer.